What A Remarkable Age This Is!

My dear Mr. Latimer!
Prepare to greet our clientele
Our meeting is imminent
Our having just rung the dinner bell.
It won't be a novelty
We mostly have senn them all before...
Prepare for the usual
You should be aware of what's in store...
We've served them on the Baltic
And the Oceanic,
Olympic and Majestic.
And todays the same
There's nothing changed...
Mr. Astor takes his toast dry.
Mrs. Straus likes the grouse
With the sauce on the side.
And the Wideners love kidney pie.
Bring it hot, if it's not
They'll be fit to be tied.
They're accustomed to the best
Of all that money buys.
The world of free enterprise
Has given the privilege to the rich...
When they're idle
They're entitled to the luxery
Which we provide
That's forever the source of our pride...
Which is why we're always there
With our especial form of care
For every hungry millionaire
By now they've all arrived...

We're sailing aboard th greatest ship
That ever sailed the seas.
The hull and the keel imperviously
Stronger by degress!

Magnificient crystal chandeliers,
Parquet in all the floors.

The ceiling is Jacobean
A decor the world adores
Remarkable ship
Oh, what a ship!
Remarkable ship
Oh, what a ship!
Remarkable ship
Oh, what a ship!
If I could be put in a phrase... it's
"What a remarkable age this is!"

A fellow's invented see- through film
He calls it: " cellophane!"

Another has built a parachute
For jumping out of an airplane!
Remarkable things flow endlessly
From out the humans brain!
Indeed and what a remarkable age this is!

Keep the captain's table pristine
Where we seat the elite whom we happily serve.
Here they dine on fine french cuisine
It's the creme de la creme's
Exclusive preserve!
It's the pleasure of the leisure class's greatest wits
To be where the captain sits
When taking their dinner on the sea.
Giving deference to their preferences is our chief art!
We play a part
In a perfectly working machine.
You should ever be aware
This is privilege great and rare,
A special burden that we bear
In our respective lives!

Remarkable! U.S. steel
Is splitting shares at five of four!
Monopoly makes the industry
Far better than before!

Attending thecoronation of
King George the Fifth was grand.

And afterwards off to Monaco
To frolic in the sand.

Remarkable talk
Oh, what a talk!
Remarkable times
Oh, what a time!
Remarkable world
Oh, what a world!
So much to surprise an amaze and...

What a remarkable time
What a remarkable world
What a remarkable age...

The hull and the keel
Impervious
Magnificent crystal
Chandeliers
A fellow invented see-
Through film
And what a remarkable age...

This...
Is!