(Lord, It'S Hard To Be Happy When You'Re Not) Using The Metric System

12 Inches per foot, 2 pints to a quart
Why don't we make it easy?
The English system of measurement
Must be laid to history
We can use units of ten and convert with ease
Like all the other countries
I am in command, yes I am taking a stand
From this disease we must be free
(Good God!)

You're drunk with your tradition
That has no validity
While I'm intoxicated with smart demetrics
Come drink a decaliter with me
We want metrics, we want it now
We know we can win
I weigh 170 pounds, that's 90 kilograms
See, metrics can even make you thin

All cool things are in metrics
For example, here's just one
I got my 9, well that's 9 millimeters
Sounds cooler than my 20-something inches gun
The boat of the nonexistent dead
Will call me communist, they'll call me scum
But it's worth it, Canadians will think we're smart
At least they'll think we are not as dumb

You're drunk with your tradition
That has no validity
While I'm intoxicated with smart demetrics
Come drink a decaliter with me
We want metrics, we want it now
We know we can win
I weigh 170 pounds, that's 90 kilograms
See, metrics can even make you thin

The revolution's here
We must overcome at last
As we symbolically stick their fucking foot
Up their fucking ass
Guitar!

You are drunk with your tradition
That has no validity
While I'm intoxicated with smart demetrics
Come drink a decaliter with me
We want metrics, we want it now
We know we can win
I weigh 170 pounds, that's 90 kilograms
See, metrics can even make me thin