No One Is Reliable

Recently been going under
Colder than the tundra
You be sleeping on me slumber
Only want to give you the cucumber
Wouldn't give my heart
I won't give my brain
Used to think that I was smart
Swear to god I've gone insane
In times I lack awareness
What some others call careless
Rarely I get embarrassed
Based on other peoples standards
Not the type of dude to pander
Though they don't like my candor
I'm tryna be myself in a world full of cancer
Keep it brief
Chase relief
From the pain and the stress
Ran away I never left
You know I'm sad you never guessed
I regressed so far
Pushed too hard
That I dropped my guard
Now my hearts in shards
Grown numb for the world
Numb for the pain
Dumb for the girls
Use my dick for a brain
If it don't go well ain't got nothing to say
Guess it's all my fault best be walking away
Miss the good times
I miss the old days
I know my head spins when the Earth rotates
And my thoughts crowd but they ain't got no space
I been telling myself that it's okay
But it's not though
I was at the top floor
And then I jumped off and I cracked my skull
Down onto the pavement
I ain't been the same since
For this world I ain't ever had the patience
Love to tell me what I lack
Like it's a matter of fact
You're jumping to conclusions don't expect me to react
One time I had a good thing but it ended in a flash
I see no one is reliable and I'm okay with that
I put the weight upon myself
I should not blame anyone else
Nothing is permanent in this life the snow will melt
And I've accepted that, but nonetheless
Realizing this was painful I guess
But once I learned the lesson it was easier to cope
People in it for themselves I used to blame em, now I don't
Friends don't worry bout your feelings they too worried bout their own
I have to not worry about the things that I can not control
Don't you catch my drift
You following along
I hope that one day someone proves this wrong
But I will not hold my breath
This ain't woah is me, this is real a f
No one is reliable
No one is reliable
No one is reliable
Except me