All Apart

“Play the part of You,
And learn it well.

Step out for the first time,
Leaving comfort behind.
Here: your peers; your newest of fears,
And you are to fall in line.
Make peace with the unfamiliar,
Its form, set in stone.”

Hurried into a sense of Self.
Rules unwritten, norms unspoken,
Mores to remain unbroken.
“You, who must bend to its folly,
Unallowed to break.”

Encouraged to flourish then punished all the same.
All that you teach is all that you betray.
No face to save when there’s no face to lose.
Which side of your mouth can I trust?

How dare you preach
That which you cannot practise.
“You are not the same,
Are you?”

To be deemed Other than
Should free you of the heavy burden
Of living a life you weren’t to live,
Fighting a fight you weren’t to win,
But alas, I still feel the weight.

So I retreat in search of solid ground,
In hope a haven forms about me,
With each of my patterns stitched on every flag,
Each bridge burned, every arrow drawn.

I am all apart.
I abstain.
I am recluse.