Hopeless Disease

Strange I feel 
I cannot recognize myself at all
All memories gone and I have simply no 
Idea what my burning pain is all about

I confuse 
My blurring visions with reality 
My deepest fears are taking over me
And I've got no more will to run or hide

Losing peace of mind, I am drowning in the flow                    
Carrying me into the abyss, carrying down into the abyss
I am grasping at my shattered visions like at straw
In the blaze of a hopeless disease

And sometimes 
My helpless hate returns me to the time 
When I could change it all but now I can't deny
It's much too late to try, it hurts me so

How to live?
A heavy burden on my aching soul
How can I even smile at all? 
I've written many lines for nobody 
To read and learn what's wrong with me

Losing peace of mind, I am drowning in the flow                    
Carrying me into the abyss, carrying down into the abyss
I'm grasping at my shattered visions like at straw
In the blaze of a hopeless disease
In the blaze of a hopeless disease