Sullivan: The Mikado / Act 1: 13. I Am So Proud, If I Allowed
John Reed
3:15The criminal cried as he dropped him down In a state of wild alarm With a frightful, frantic, fearful frown I bared my big right arm! I seized him by his little pig-tail And on his knees fell he As he squirmed and struggled and gurgled and guggled I drew my snickersnee! My snickersnee! Oh, never shall I forget the cry Or the shriek that shrieked he As I gnashed my teeth When from its sheath I drew my snickersnee! We know him well, he cannot tell Untrue or groundless tales He always tries to utter lies And every time he fails He shivered and shook as he gave the sign For the stroke he didn't deserve When all of a sudden his eye met mine And it seemed to brace his nerve For he nodded his head and kissed his hand And he whistled an air, did he As the sabre true cut cleanly through His cervical vertebrae! His vertebrae! When a man's afraid a beautiful made Is a cheering sight to see And it's oh, I'm glad That moment sad Was soothed by sight of me! Her terrible tale you can't assail With truth it quite agrees Her taste exact for fautless fact Amounts to a disease Now though you'd have said that head was dead For its owner, dead was he It stood on its neck with a smile well bred And bowed three times to me! It was none of you impudent off hand nods But as humble as could be For it clearly knew the deference due To a man of pedigree! Of pedigree! And it's oh, I vow, this deathly bow Was a touching sight to see Though trunkless, yet, it couldn't forget The deference due to me! This haughty youth, he speaks the truth Whenever he finds it pays And in this case it all took place Exactly as he says Exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly as he says!