Prison (Live At Circle Star Theatre, San Carlos, Ca. 12/81) (Live At Circle Star Theatre, San Carlos, Ca. 12/81; Remastered)

I went to Arizona State Penitentiary
To do a film with Gene Wilder, right?
We did a film called Stir Crazy
And it was really strange because
It's 80% black people in there
And you say, "Well, why is that strange?"
Because there are no black people in Arizona

I mean, they bus motherfuckers in
And I was there, and I've always said the black man
Been fucked over, you know, the revolution, motherfuckin' whitey
Motherfucker fucked over us, we got a good heart, we nice people
Just get a bad break
And I was there six weeks, and I talked to some of the brothers there
Thank God we got penitentiaries

I said to myself, "Why'd you kill everybody in the house?" They was home
I met a motherfucker named J-Bo
He has a sentence hear the sentence
Triple life
How do you do triple life?
That mean if he die and come back
He gotta go to penitentiary
Right there he say, "Fuck Kindergarten

Get your little ass on in the penitentiary motherfucker
You know what you did last time you was here"
And Gene Wilder always like to jump in the middle of 'em
"Hi, guys, how you doin'?"
I said, "Gene, get your ass out of there, man"
"What do you think they'd do to us, Rich?"
I said, "Fuck us
We would be pussy on a hoof"

Gene told me, he said, "Well, I'm not a homosexual"
I said "that ain't got nothin' to do with it!
They don't fuck you 'cause they like it"
Motherfucker said, "I just wanted to see that look on your face"
I just can't imagine two old, big, greasy-ass murderers fucking each other
"Hey, baby, you wanna let me get some tonight?"
"Yeah, daddy, go for yourself
You tell anybody, I'll kill you"

'Cause you gotta admit, a asshole look like a asshole
Right, I don't care how you dress it up
It's still a asshole
You can ask anybody say, "What's that look like?"
"An asshole
Pretty asshole, but it's a asshole"
Forty years, I'd fuck some
"You want my grits?"
That's the cold-blooded part
I say, "Motherfucker, you don't teach nobody nothin'"

Mexicans in the prison, the Mexicans everybody got gangs right?
The Mexicans got the Bujuvas the Minjins, the tattoos and shit
Motherfuckin' Mexicans had a tattoo
They don't wear no shirts in prison
The Mexicans don't wear no shirt, they even tattoo 'em on
And the white boys, they got the Ku Klux Klan and the Nazi Party
This is what they be livin' with with each other
They all criminals
And they can't unite

Right, and the black brothers
They got the Mau Maus and the Muslims, the double Muslims
Them's the motherfuckers you don't want to fuck with
The double Muslims
That mean the motherfucker been here twice
He can't wait to get back to Allah
And he wanna take eight or nine motherfuckers with him
As he cut your throat, he be hollerin', "Salaam alaikum

Pass me a loaf of bread"
I met a dude, he was doin' murder, kidnap four times
This is the fourth time he'd been caught at the same shit
'Cause I thought three strikes, that was your ass
That's not true. I said, "what happened?"
"I can't get this shit right
I'm gettin' parole in two years, you know, I'm gonna do a deuce
I'm gonna get my shit together."
I wanna know when he gettin' out, who he gonna be with

If I see him in my neighborhood
I'm gonna shoot the motherfucker just on GP
'Cause kidnappers always wanna make you put your hands behind your back
Fuck that
Shoot my face off with the shotgun while I got your nuts
So the police can find some evidence
"Open up his hand, will ya?

This guy's gonna be easy to find
He's gonna show at a hospital sooner or later, that's for damn sure"
That's the way we really think we are
You know, I mean, everybody wants to be heroic and shit
That's the way we really, that's how we get fucked up
Because when a shotgun is in your face
Your hand has more brains than you

Your hand will jump behind your back
Your hand will say, "'Scuse me, Motherfucker's got a shotgun"
And the hand be sayin', "Give me some rope
How's this knot?"
I'd hate to get kidnapped, man
And somebody call my wife up askin' for money
I know I'm a goner

"Oh, you have him? You do? You want what?
Uh, just a minute, I'll call the accountant, I'll get back to you
Don't hurt the suit, we might have to bury him in it."