Bluey Brink

There once was a shearer by name Bluey Brink
He's a devil for work, he's a devil for drink
He could shear five hundred a day without fear
He could drink without flinching twelve gallons of beer
Now Jimmy the barman who served out the drink
How he hated the sight of that there Bluey Brink
For he stayed much too late and he'd come much too soon
At morning, at evening, at night-time, at noon
Now one morning when Jimmy was cleaning the bar
With sulphuric acid he kept in a jar
Well in come the shearer a-bawling with thirst
Saying, "Whatever you got, Jim, just hand me the first"
Well it ain't told in history and it ain't put in print
That Bluey drunk acid with never a wink
Saying, "That's the stuff, Jimmy, Christ strike me stone dead
It'll make me the ringer of Stephenson's Shed"
But all of that day as he served out the beer
The barman was trembling with worry and fear
Too nervous to argue, too anxious to fight
Thinking that shearer might not last the night
But the very next morning when he opened the door
Oh, in come the shearer a-bawling for more
With his eyebrows all singed and his whiskers deranged
And holes in his hide like a dog with the mange
Oh, and says Jimmy, "How'd you like the new stuff?"
"Well, it's all right," says Bluey, "but I ain't had enough
And it sets me to coughing and you know I'm no liar
Every cough that I make sets me whiskers on fire"