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Since 2018 we've worked at Office Max
A new guy joined the team,
His name was also Max
We made small talk to see what we had in common
Have you seen Rat Race?
He says "yeah I think I saw it"

We wrapped our shift in silence, clocked out at 10:03
Max invites us over,
He's got Nintendo Wii
We get to his apartment, he says please take off your shoes
I'll fire up the Wii, and get some beers for you dudes.

We start to take our shoes off when we see it in the foyer
Frozen Flamingos, staring at the wall in horror
It's a

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HIS ONLY DECORATION IS A
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IT'S LEVELED AND IT'S CENTERED
IT'S A BLANK WHITE POSTER

Is Max a psychopath or does it mean something to him?
Did he get Whoppi's autograph with a Tide Pen?
Is it a close up of a Polar Bear, or is he Sweeney Todd?
LIke maybe he's agnostic, it's a picture of his God.
Is Max a lunatic, or is it avant garde?
Is it a pic of Kathy Bates, and it glows in the dark?
No. This dude is sick and twisted like Jared Leto's joker
Put Max behind bars, he's guilty of hanging up a

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HIS ONLY DECORATION IS A
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SAME COLOR AS THE WALLS ITS A
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"Everything alright in there, guys?"
"Yeah we're cool. Just refreshing up!"
"So you guys wanna make your own Mii's?
Or you wanna use some stock ones? Or what's up?
The stock ones are pretty funny.
There's one with a crown and buck teeth that's pretty funny."

We should've known he's crazy when he looked us in the face
And said he may or may not have seen Rat Race
You'd know if you saw Smashmouth stick it to John Cleese
Praire-doggin' with Jon Lovitz
IT'S GOT FRIGGIN' MR. BEAN
We have to take some action, we've been in here for an hour
We climb atop each other's shoulders
TALL BOY SPECIAL POWERS!
It's John, Alex, Zack: 6'5" 6'4" and 3
In2 1 big giant Tall Boy standing
19 Total Feet.
Max the jig is up, no more playing games!
Lunge across the room, I grab the ornate frame
Smash it on his head, then a flash of light beams
The frame falls to the floor, Max is nowhere to be seen
Turn around the frame, lying in the foyer
Max is in the frame, staring back in horror

From the
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NOW IT IS A PORTRAIT
OF OUR OFFICE MAX COWORKER
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IT TRAPPED HIM WITH OUR BEERS
WHAT A BLANK WHITE BUMMER

We get off each other's shoulders, we're weak despite our size
We plan on playing Wii till you all arrive.
To tell you what has happened, so the Tall Boys don't get framed.
One last question for you,
Have you seen Rat Race?

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