Catabolic Seed

Oh, what's a devil to do
When those old delusions, so tried and true
Don't come through, like they used to?

Ugh! All my money's run out!
I blew it all on a cumulus cloud
That dissipated so fast
Seems the good times never last

And I always fall flat on my back
Like an upside-down cat
But is bad luck really such a crime?

If you won't be my valentine
Could you at least give me a little bit of sympathy?

Oh, I made a silly mistake
(What'd you do?)
I've given up more than I can take
(Uh oh!)
And left hollows in my wake

(I'm safe, I'm whole, I've got it under control)
My structure's compromised
(I'm safe, I'm whole, I've got it under control)
But you still batter at all my fault lines
I can't run, I can't hide (And I will protect you)
But you can't say I didn't try (Even if you won't protect me too)

To retreat back into me, like a catabolic seed
I want to destroy everything that's mine

If you won't be my valentine
Could you at least give me a little bit of sympathy?

I don't care if I'm losing myself in the garden of earthly delights
I could drop dead right where I stand, I wouldn't mind
I wouldn't mind