Higher

There are days when there are no words
And it feels like all of this will turn
To dust before me

On those days I am mustard seed small
And all the world is a wild wind.
There aren't enough poems to gather me
All I know is the cruel shapes words can take
In a mouth
In a brain

Still I offer metaphors as magic
On stages across the world
I weave stories about love and redemption
I let one heartbroken woman weep in my arms
And then another

I say to her
That I am here and you are listening
Is a kind of touching
From one end of my poem
To everywhere you carry it
Is a tether that means you are never alone
And I mean it
But I don't know how to also say
Even my own body is a dam breaching

A message chimes in like a joyful bird
A girl says my poem tugged her back
From taking flight at the edge of everything
She wants to know how to be brave like me

When I receive it
I am in fetal position
The reflection on the screen is my ragged face
I run my tongue over the grit of my teeth

I want to tell her
Sis the bravest thing I will do today
Is get out of bed

Instead I write
Thank you
Thank you
I am so glad you chose to stay

My sister threads the sound of my voice
through the needle of her intuition
And she knows
She pulls me together
Gathers me at the seams
A gentle stitch dipped in the grace
I cannot offer myself

In her words I hear this poem
There's a garden
Where wildflowers like us grow free
The sun shines endlessly there
And in the heat
A breeze will fall upon you
Like a cool hand to your forehead

In this garden
The soil is rich and ready
And we are not fearful there
We do not pour our dreams in the ground
To be buried there
We plant them to bloom in spectacular colour

So on the hardest days
Shower the earth with your best intentions
And if you're lucky
A thin blade will push through
To remind you what is worth fighting for

Somewhere there's a dream
Searching for you
Running toward you
Calling out to you
Waiting until you are ready to answer