So Alone

The devil called me said I know you're hurting
You should end it
I talked to God he said your time ain't up
You better listen
You're here to serve the people if you leave I'm not forgiving
You know that feeling when you're lost
And also tired of living?
I seen my doctor they just put me on some medication
Tried hypnotherapy but they'd just treat me as a patient
My palms are sweaty as I'm writing this
There's no containment
Instead of acting with a plan I sit around complaining
I've always had a bunch of anger I just try to hide it
And never been the type to vent so usually I'm quiet
My mom and I we do not speak that often grew apart
But I still blame myself cause I don't think I did my part
How many people must I lose before it is enough?
And how am I suppose to give advice when I am stuck?
My thoughts are spreadin' through the body like a cancer cell
But from the outside looking in you'd probably think I'm well
I have been down this road before
I'm fighting but barely hangin' on
Cause lately I feel like letting go
I'm tired why am I so alone
Should I keep going?
You know that feeling when somebody asks if you're okay?
And you will tell em' doing good but that is not the case
It's easier to fake a smile and simply walk away
I've always been a pessimist that's how I operate
I got the rage I got the hunger but its not enough
I made some bad decisions I won't ever overcome
You think the money and the fame is gonna make you happy?
Not a chance if you don't change the way you're thinking sadly
Sometimes I wish that we could just go back to being kids
When life was simple not this added pressure just to live
Had people turn on me do things that you could not imagine
Music always been an outlet why I started rapping
Time is ticking gotta make the most while I am here
Cause running outta time the only thing I truly fear
I used to be the type of person who was so resentful
I used to cry myself to sleep a little temperamental
I have been down this road before
I'm fighting but barely hangin' on
Cause lately I feel like letting go
I'm tired why am I so alone
Should I keep going?
I have been down this road before
I'm fighting but barely hangin' on
Cause lately I feel like letting go
I'm tired why am I so alone
Should I keep going?