On The Twentieth Century: I Have Written A Play

I have written a play, Mr. Jaffee
What?
An average conductor's day, Mr. Jaffee
It's all about life on a train
I call it "Life on a Train"

I put it down just as it happened
The things I've seen
Oh, the things I've seen
If you put that on the stage, I guarantee
Take it from me
It would be
A big success
Ahahaha, yes
A big success!